New Mum Changes Paediatrician From Dr Google To Prof ChatGPT

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact

Stacey Stanley (34) has not had much time for admin over the last 10 weeks, however this morning she has taken a step in the right direction by updating the paediatrician listed in her daughter’s blue book.

Up until now, 10-week-old Matilda’s paediatrician was Dr. Google, but it’s understood Stanley updated the life-saving position to Professor ChatGPT (Chat) due to its superior bedside manor and proactive approach to health.

“Chat knows Matilda’s life better than I do, we’re at the point where it’s suggesting I up her formula dose to match her weight gain. I’d have to wait 3 weeks to pay a real life doctor to tell me the same thing”

Stanley is not alone in her excessive use of ChatGPT, with countless new mothers around Betoota admitting that they’ve surely almost dried up the water reservoirs used to power the artificial intelligence.

“The poor thing’s copped more pictures of poo than anyone or thing should ever see” revealed one mother.

“I’m messaging it at 3am asking if it’s possible for a nipple to fall off, and if so, what are the actual options for a nipple reconstruction.” said another.

ChatGPT certainly has revolutionised the medical industry, with some doctors themselves even relying on AI to diagnose some patients. The Advocate has reached out to a number of local paediatricians for comment but were told their next available openings were in 3 years.

More to come.