Melbourne Taking Their ‘Most European City’ Vibe To A Whole Other Level

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The rest of the nation remains uneasy as Melbourne experiences a spike in coronavirus cases, leading many who aren’t from Victoria feeling like the nation’s most European city is taking that self-description to a whole other level.

Locals here in the Diamantina are calling on the Queensland Government to scrap the plan to re-open the borders with the south on July 10 – that’s unless the Government plans to ban Victorians from entering.

But that’s only if New South Wales and South Australia effectively close Victoria off from the rest of the country.

One local publican spoke to The Advocate today about Victoria and why he doesn’t want those puffer jacket-wearing freaks anywhere near the Sunshine State.

“Melbourne is Australia’s most European city not only because of its culture but also because of it’s problems,” said Martin Davidson, owner and licensee of French Quarter institution, La Branlette de L’étranger.

“It’s not just been kissed by the pangolin, it’s been tongued. And on top of that, it’s cold and the people look funny,”

“Southerners have this fascination with Europe that I’ll never understand. Melbourne and Sydney don’t even have a French Quarter. Mate, almost half of our district can speak Betootanese creole. They think us Queenslanders are dumb. Victorians can’t even wash their hands, boorie.”

The Advocate reached out to the Victorian Government for comment but have yet to receive a reply as it’s still Sunday there.

More to come.