Maid Of Honour Delights Wedding Guests By Not Doing A Poem

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact

Love filled the air this afternoon at a ritzy Lake Como inspired wedding on the foreshore of Lake Betoota. Love, and something else: relief.

It’s believed that this wave of interconnected relief is directly linked to the Maid of Honour’s speech and the fact that she didn’t do a poem, or start off by saying she asked Google how to write a maid of honour speech.

When asked what made the speech so good, guests couldn’t offer up much other than ‘it just wasn’t a poem’.

“I’ve been to a bunch of weddings and I’d say about 40% of them [sic] do poems” said Tony Orwell, a school friend of the groom.

It’s not fully understood why Maid of Honours pick such an intimate and important occasion to try their hand at poetry, perhaps it triggers some deep fear response that transports them back to their year 7 public speaking days. Or perhaps they’re all narcissists hoping to secretly make the day about them and their undiscovered poetic brilliance.

Whatever the reason, guests and wedding party alike are thrilled at the turn of events, with the bride and groom extending the cocktail hour by another 30 minutes to honour the quick and tasteful speech.

More to come.