Local Man Gets His Dirty Little Mitts On Some Pill-Pressed Pingers Like It’s 2005

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Local man, Thomas Trilby (28) has gotten his hands on some 2005 quality ecstasy tablets, it has been confirmed.

After double checking with his dealer, Mr Trilby was informed that the $25 per unit deal was not an exaggeration, and that it was just like the old days.

“I couldn’t believe it. This guy must know some bikies or some shit,” said Mr Trilby.

“Who the fuck knows where to get full on pressed doopers these days?”

While Mr Trilby has clarified that the tablets aren’t printed with the logo of an international automotive manufacturer, he still reckons they are good to go.

“I haven’t been able to get my mits on a round one since Rudd’s stimulus package,” he said.

“It’s a real throw back. I’m getting sick of the lucky dip I get with the [capsules] nowadays anyway.. You’re either moonwalking or plucking out your fingernails on that shit,”

With his dealer claiming access to ‘heaps more’ – Thomas says he’s just going to see how he pulls up next week and if he’s not too scat, he’ll give them another crack.

“If they do what they are meant to do, I’ll be sorting the boys out next week too,”