Local Girl Battling A Hangover Fucks It Up Worse By Ordering Chilli Crab Scrambled Eggs

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

A delicious plate of chilli crab infused scrambled eggs is expected to get scraped into a cafe bin this morning, after a local party girl ordered herself the wrong breakfast.

The story comes as 34-year-old lawyer Taylor Crinitti battles what she herself describes as the type of hangover that’s “made me want to give up drinking, forever”.

After meeting up with a few mates after work at the Margies Bar in the Old Quarter, The Advocate understands Taylor’s night went nuclear when she and her mates discovered the bar had a $15 cocktail hour, between 9pm-11pm.

Now nursing twisted guts and an orange glowing tongue courtesy of the six Aperols she inhaled around 10:30pm last night, Taylor thought a brisk walk and some breakfast at a trendy cafe might be able to cure the icky feeling swelling in her tummy.

However, unlike most people who’d stick to ordering plain toast, or a bacon and egg roll, it’s believed her local cafe’s swanky menu boasting singaporean crab infused eggs really caught her eyes, which were still a little glassy from last night’s festivities.“I think I might get the Chilli Crab Scrambled Eggs!” Taylor told her partner Blake, as she ran her eyes up and down the specials chalkboard hanging from the wall.

“You sure babe, what about just going with some toast?”, replied Blake, who this morning had to disinfect the toilet bowl twice to remove the heavy vomity acrid smell wafting from the bathroom.

“Yeah, either that or the Korean Eggs Benedict on Maple Waffles! I’ve always wanted to try it!”

Fast forward 20 minutes into their sunny breakfast, and the sheer smell of spicy, creamy scrambled eggs topped with briny crab, was enough to send Taylor outside for a tacky vom. Twice.

No more to come.