Earth Mummy Wonders Why Fussy Child Doesn’t Want Her Delicious Choc Liver Balls

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact

Sage Drinkwater (39) is laying out her calming crystals this morning after her child, Rainbow Freedom (8), has once again refused to eat any of the delicious organic biodynamic handmade food Drinkwater so lovingly prepared for them.

It’s believed this is a common occurrence in the Drinkwater household, and the part-time death doula and aura photographer is at her wits end, she explains.

“Bovine gelatin bites, choc liver balls, they won’t even eat ghee! I don’t know what else I can do”, she sighed to our reporter who happened to be covering another story on the same commune as Drinkwater.

“I wonder if it’s autism”

When asked if she had tried some more traditional foods like avocado or banana, Drinkwater acted like someone had just shoved a high gluten piece of processed white bread down her throat.

“Do you know how many pesticides and fungicides are on those mass produced neurotoxin death traps?”

“Next you’ll be suggesting I give them a store bought muesli bar” she scoffed.

With the interview appearing to be over Sage got up to leave with Rainbow Freedom, who secretly slipped a note to our reporter. Much to the reporter’s surprise, the note was a cry for help, reading “starving plaese halp, need food”.

Unfortunately by the time our reporter looked up, Sage and Rainbow Freedom had disappeared into the hinterland.

More to come.