KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
Twas’ the night before Christmas and all through the land,
The country sat and admired a man so beautifully tanned,
There under the spotlights Anthony Callea belted a tune,
And by the second verse he had made the whole nation swoon.
Jaws are dropping across the Nation this evening, as 7-time Carols by Candlelight superstar Anthony Callea steps out to deliver his yearly performance of ‘Silent Night’.
Despite Wikipedia searches confirming Mr Callea is closer to 40 rather than 30, it’s understood living rooms across Australia are sitting back in awe at the singer-songwriters’ breathtakingly glowing skin.
“I just don’t know how he does it,” said Betoota Lakes mother of four, Renae Simpkins.
“I remember I had this massive crush on him when I was in High School and here he is 17 years later waltzing out on National television with skin so clear I can almost see my reflection.”
“Like which damn cleanser is he using, he’s flawless!”.
Despite performing for close to two decades under harsh stage lighting and maintaining a rigorous touring schedule, The Advocate understands years of hydration and a militant nightly moisturising routine have kept Mr Callea at the top of his game.
Speaking to Mr Callea’s publicist and long time friend, Ricki-Lee Noll, The Advocate was told that since 2005, the Australian performer has exclusively showered in Patagonian fresh water imported from Tierra del Fuego in Southern Chile.
Miss Noll also told The Advocate that Mr Callea has not eaten a square of chocolate since 2013 and commits to spending several weeks leading up to Christmas rolling his face with a jade crystal.
When asked whether Mr Callea had sought professional help to achieve wrinkle-free, youthful skin, Miss Noll refused to comment on industry rumours that he has at times received forms or laser and dermal treatments.
“Nope, it’s just the pure water and his strict carb-free diet that gets him looking so shiny every December.”
“Now shut up and watch the carols, he’s about to belt out the final verse!”
