ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Former leader of The Nationals Barnaby Joyce has thrown his Akubra into the planned deputy leadership spill this week, saying the party needs a leader who isn’t shrouded in controversy.

This comes after embattled agriculture portfolio babysitter Bridget McKenzie resigned from cabinet and the deputy position, opting to fall on her star picket over the ‘sports rorts controversy.’

Mr Joyce also added that should the party choose to spill both deputy and leader positions, he will stand to be leader.

“Our great party needs a clean slate,” he said.

“Someone like me.”

Mr Joyce responded to The Advocate‘s requests for comment by saying that we were not friends anymore and he would not be commenting on anything.

A number of other Nationals backbenchers have put their hand up to be counted in the deputy ballot.

They include Anonymous 64-year-old Man #7 and former doctor.

Popular Queensland Nationals George Christensen and Matt Canavan have told The Advocate this morning that they’d rather ‘slam there [sic] cock in a door’ than run unsuccessfully for the deputy role.

Nevertheless, according to Michael McCormack, the Nationals leader, the party is only planning to spill the deputy position.

“Come on, now. This is the first I’ve heard of this and I can tell you that we’re only spilling the deputy position,” he said.

“Do you want to hear me sing again? Wait here, I’ll go and get my Elvis costume out of my office. You see, Parkes is near Wagga Wagga, which is where I live which means I go to the Parkes Elvis Festival all the time, which is why I have this costume, just wait here, I’ll be back,”

“People accuse me of being wooden but would a wooden person have an Elvis costume in their wardrobe?”

In the ensuing silence, both Michael and the reporters he asked that question to all concluded independently that a wooden person probably would.

More to come.


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