Taylor Swift’s Next Album To Be As Boring As Most Engaged Friends Are

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

In exciting but daunting news for the Swifties, The Betoota Advocate can reveal that pop music superstar Taylor Swift and her NFL player romeo Travis Kelce are officially engaged!

The pair announced the news to her hundreds of millions of fans last night via an Instagram post, which showed several snapshots of the lovebirds standing in a garden after Kelce got his knee dirty.

This announcement has sent shockwaves through the Taylor Swift fanbase, as Swifties begin questioning whether or not this major development in their messiah’s love life will affect her unique brand of pop music for unlucky in love women with Type A personalities.

Already, it seem that there are rumblings that Tay-Tay has gotten a bit boring since getting engaged (4 hours ago) and she rarely does anything fun anymore.

It is believed that her next album will be mostly about the frustrating conversations she is having with florists and venue operators – as well as the gruelling decisions she has to make when it comes to the guest list and catering.

Concerns are growing that she’s about to become as tediuous and dull as every other friend who gets engaged and suddenly can’t talk about anything else.

Swifties are now murmuring amongst themselves that Taylor has lost her spark, and actually maybe she and Travis need to take a break – because they just want the old Tay-Tay back.

She’s also not really going out for dinner or drinks because she wants to get shredded for the wedding, and oh don’t even ask about the dress, that’s a whole other story. But yeah, she’s isn’t not really going near wine or sugar right now because it causes breakouts, but if you want to hang out, she’s going to drive across town to meet with the guy who does crockery hire. She’s not really sure about what plates she wants, so it’d be great to get a second opinion.

Meanwhile, the NFL fanbase hasn’t really given this announcement too much thought – given the fact that most of Travis Kelce’s team mates have like six kids each and got married at 19.