Yep .....................................................
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Yep, go on. If you can and are able, enjoy one, two or however fucking many
The Nation
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(Page 151)
JB Hi-Fi Employee Can’t Tell You What Blender To Get But Can Tell You Dookie Was Green Day’s Greatest Work
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT JB Hi-Fi employee Ryan McDonald has made it abundantly clear that while his knowledge of household
Winter’s Puffer Vest Wanker Now Summer’s Beach Cabana Cockhead
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The shores of Lake Betoota have become the battleground for the latest iteration of seasonal superiority
Hometown Shopping Centre Doubles as Unofficial High School Reunion Venue
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT Returning to her hometown of Betoota Heights to spend Christmas with her family, Abigail Walters (27)
Client Who Really Wants This Done Before Christmas Unaware Tradie Really Doesn’t Care
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local yuppie from Betoota Grove has today been frustrated to within an inch of his
Local Moron Goes Into The Office
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A city man is shaking his damn head today, after fumbling the bag like a frickin
Fresh Packet Of Zooper Doopers Not Long For This World
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Zooper Doopers across the country are taking their final breaths today. As the nation winces through
Opinion: Celebrating Saruman’s Death Is Wrong, He Was A Father
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact One of the more moving stories I find myself returning to is an account of the
Mate Who Just Completely Missed The Cue Ball Told To Hand His Car Keys Over
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local man has this weekend had matters taken out of his hands. In some welcome
No No No No Nooooooooooooooo, Older Sister’s New Boyfriend Looks Like This
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local family unit is today coming to terms with a tough new reality. The immediate
Major Hotel Chains Quietly Stop Hosting Australia Day Events As They Don’t Draw A Crowd Anymore Because This Needlessly Mythologised And Alcohol-Fuelled Celebration Of Chest-Beating Patriotism Is An Increasingly Irrelevant Liberal Party Invention That Has
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact As Peter Dutton ramps up his culture wars by refusing to stand in front of the
Pandemic Support Floofers Put Up For Adoption In Record Numbers Because Their Owners Are Selfish Yuppie Fucks
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As many around the nation begin shutting down for the year, those on the frontline in
Christmas Party Hijacked By Filo Workmate’s Cunning Plan To End Up At Karaoke
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact A work Christmas Party in Betoota’s Old City District is looking very likely to descend