Mary And Fred Spotted Polishing Off 6 Pints Of Moo Brew At The Whaler In Salamanca
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The closest thing Australia has to a royal family outside of the sports world, have finally
Politics
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Two Years Of Marketing Focus Groups Determine That It Was All Jenny’s Fault They Went To Hawaii
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After two whole years of intensive focus groups and market research aimed at softening the public
“Bro. It’s All Good. We Got You” Says Channel 9 Chairman And Former Liberal Treasurer Peter Costello
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the entire Federal Cabinet implodes due to Morrison’s relentless bridge-burning and factional disputes, even
PM Asks His Advisors If The National Press Club Is Government Funded, And If So, Let’s Review That
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After a fortnight of leaked text messages and an unprecedented grilling from the same media outlets
Pauline Whips Out The Burqa Again After Embarrassing Encounter With Wasp Nest
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In a story that would have dominated the newscycle in simpler times, One Nation founder and
Central QLD Man Hospitalised After Accusing Local Labor Candidate Of Being In Bed With The Greens
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT There have been reports of a rather noisy Quiet Australian being hospitalised in Central Queensland this
Scotty Announces New Cash Bonus For Aged Care Workers That Increases Every Time One Of Them Dies
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact With the election just around the corner, Prime Minister Scott Morrison has decided to put on
Facebook Hits Scotty With Targeted Ads For Waikiki Beach As Bushfire Warnings Appear In Newsfeed
EFFIE BATEMAN | LIFESTYLE | CONTACT In breaking news that nobody except 99% of the world’s scientists could have predicted, it
Government To Solve Supply Chain Issues By Creating 4-Month Backlog For Forklift Certifiers
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Scott Morrison has all but secured the warehouse and fruit markets vote today, by telling Australia’
PM Asks Toddler Playing With Toy Cash Register If She’d Be Up For A Few Shifts At Woolies
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT Scotty from Marketing has today truly outdone himself by suggesting an incredible solution to the nation’
Scotty Just Holding On For Australia Day Debate To Overshadow RATs Mismanagement
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT With Australia deciding they have heard just enough about an unvaxxed Serbian hotel room enthusiast who
Sky News Oddly Quiet About Latest Attempt To Mix Sport With Politics
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the Novak Djokovic debacle continues to unfold in Melbourne, it’s been revealed that Sky
“We’re Going To Have To Live With This Virus” Says PM, In Reference To George Christensen
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Bad news for Australians who tried to do the right thing in 2021 as Prime Minister