Surry Hills In Lockdown After Melbourne Storm And Broncos Fans Exchange Slurs In Inner-Sydney Cafe

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Emergency services have issued an urgent ‘stay indoors’ notice for Sydney’s most popular inner-city cafe strip this morning, as major incident unfolds in Surry Hills.

With a long weekend and NRL grand final at AAMI Park on Sunday, it seems that out of state rugby league fans have taken Friday off work and begun to descend upon the NSW capital.

And as is often the case for concertgoers or sports fans that are visiting Sydney, both the Brisbane Broncos and Melbourne Storm supporters have gravely underestimated how far the stadium is from the city’s landmarks and tourism hot spots.

This means that Sydney’s most non-rugby-league cultural precincts are currently being swamped by Maroon and Purple.

While hostilities between the two fanbases can be expected, it’s the local residents who are feeling the most under siege as they witness some of the most politically incorrect conduct to take place in inner-Sydney since the Roger Rogerson era.

According to emergency updates, a prominent gluten-free FODMAP breakfast cafe on Crown Street has become the scene of some catastrophically problematic behaviour from visiting NRL fans, who were just looking for a place to get a feed.

Witnesses state the incident began when a Melbourne Stom recognised the Horse logo on a Queenslander’s spray jacket.

“Oh fuck here we go. Look at this two-headed mouther breather” said the Melbourne Storm fan, obviously was on the front foot to defend his love of rugby league despite coming from an AFL state.

The Broncos was was quick to return fire.

“Oh blow it out your arse you salary cap cheating cunt” spat back the Queenslander.

Diners and staff were quick to duck for cover, assuming these two heathens would immediately engage in hand-to-hand combat.

However, what came next was arguably worse. Just six or seven extremely offensive remarks exchanged between the two men.

Witnesses were brought to tears as they heard comments like “You fucken slack jawed rednecks have no idea what’s coming for you” and “Payne Haas is going to fuck Melbourne in the arse on Sunday night and you’re going to love it”

At time of press the two men had wandered out of the cafe after both agreeing that the menu items were fucken suss as.