NRL Club With Clear Drinking And Gambling Problems To Turn It All Around By Giving Up Steak

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

The Brisbane Broncos have sensationally unveiled their plans to turn the ship around for the 2020 season.

Speaking exclusively to The Advocate this morning the club with some pretty well-documented behavioural problems has confirmed that going plant-based is what will win them a Premiership.

“Yeah, we watched Game Changers,” laughed a powerbroker at the club where a bunch of first-graders were out on the piss having a run at the pokies the night before their finals match against Parramatta this year.

“And we are all going plant-based here. You should try it to you know? I can recommend some really good easy to make recipes for dinners and pre-packed lunches? And some awesome little snacks you can make to get you through the day to start off with?”

“Anyway, yeah it’s gonna be meat-free BronxNation next year, and you are going to see our players go to the next level.”

“And now Wayne Bennet’s gone the team don’t need BBQ’s,” he laughed.

The spokesperson then explained that they wouldn’t be implementing alcohol policies like at the Storm.

“Vodka Lime Soda’s don’t contain in animal products, so let the boys play.”