Sky News To Rerun Meghan Markle Hate Pieces Until This Whole Epstein Thing Blows Over

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact

Trump describes them as a “Democrat hoax”, the Dems think they’re a silver bullet for bringing down an unhinged Republican party, and our friends over at Sky News don’t even know what you’re talking about – the who-what-stein files?

For most media outlets, the drip feeding of The Epstein Files has been like a weird pedo-sex-trafficking advent calendar, each day bringing with it a twisted little gift to unwrap and report to the world. 

However, according to a leaked production schedule from the Murdoch-run Sky News, there are far more important things to cover than the President’s long-standing proximity to a convicted child sex offender – a man Trump once called a “terrific guy” and “a lot of fun to be with”, he even declared that they share a taste in women “on the younger side.”

The more important stories, according to this leaked document, are about Meghan Markle.

While the rest of the world hasn’t really thought about her since she starred in Suits, Sky News is heroically upholding their journalistic integrity by covering the apparent devil incarnate from every angle. 

Some of the stories include: “Meghan: She's Worse Than Andrew”, “Is Meghan Markle The Worst Actress Of All Time?” and “Why This Black Tea Drinker Will Never Be Accepted In The UK or The US”. 

The Advocate reached out to a mole inside Sky, who confirmed that their plan of action was to just wait until “this whole Epstein thing blows over”, and if they run out of ways to assassinate Markle’s character then there is always renewables to fall back on. 

More to come.