Profit Fuelled Expansion Of World Cup Guarantees Inclusion Of Countries You Didn't Know Existed

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FIFA’s decision to expand the World Cup from 32 to 64 teams, supposedly to give smaller nations a fairer chance and definitely not to double their profits, has been met with hesitation from purists who argue the massive expansion undermines the prestige of qualifying for the tournament.

The purist argument was further supported earlier this week with the qualification of Curucao, a country that even your most autistic mate has never heard of.

Curaçao, a dependency of The Netherlands located just off the coast of Venezuela in the Caribbean, has a population of 150,000 and mainly serves as a holidaying spot for Dutch people and a quirky reminder that the Dutch still have a colonial legacy in that part of the world.

The small Island nation secured a thrilling 0-0 draw against Jamaica, securing their spot in the world cup as the smallest nation to ever compete in the tournament.

FIFA execs were quick to make statements on the small nation's qualification.

"This is exactly why we expanded the tournament"

"Yes it seems a bit wrong that Italy might miss another World cup due to European competitiveness, but opening up to the Curacao market is very exciting for everyone at the organization"

Analysts predict that by 2034, FIFA will be proudly announcing the historic qualification of other small nations such as Nauru and The Faroe Islands.