ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A shock poll result has turned the race to The Lodge on its head today after the latest Resolve suggesting that 1 in 2 Australians feel an overflowing nappy bin would do a better job at running the country than anyone else.
With the shine now coming off One Nation due to the gaffe-prone party deputy Pauline Hanson making crude remarks about working mothers and Australians born overseas, over half the voters in this country have seemingly cast themselves adrift politically speaking.
Labor and the Coalition have both seen their popularity languish in low double digits recently because of their inability to read a room and translate that into meaningful policy ideas.
That has allowed the overflowing nappy bin to enjoy a meteoric rise from the political doldrums to measuring out the doorways down at the Prime Minister's lodgings in Canberra.
Speaking to The Advocate today, the nappy bin said that while the next election is a long way away, they are not losing focus of what made them popular at this current moment.
"I might be full of wet, heavy playground gastro nappies. Nappies with that extremely sticky and dense poo, like depleted uranium but the same consistency as toothpaste. I am full of both. I've never been hosed out, either. Week after week, I've had 40 nappies rammed into me then I get them ripped them out, often in a cheap ALDI garbage bag that bursts halfway down the driveway," he said.
"For me, a relatively air tight plastic box that's pretty much just full of piss and shit wrapped in plastic, to be the preferred Prime Minister, it's an honour but I'd say it's more a reflection on the country than my leadership abilities."
More to come.
