Nation Stops Caring About Soccer

Australia is out of the FIFA World Cup after a dispiriting 2-0 loss to already-eliminated Peru to finish bottom of Group C.

Even though our place at the bottom was more a result of things just not going our way in three different matches – no amount of explaining will be able to keep the vast number of Australians interested from this point on.

”What? We came last??” Asked one domestic code loving mouth-breather.

”Booooooringggg”

”Haha. We suck”

With the World Cup hyped now quelled for another four years, it is fair to say that Australians no longer care about soccer.

Except for a small parcel of flare-lighting Western Sydney die-heads, the rest of the country is now back to cheering for a cricket team that they hate.

”Soccer was fun. It always is. But we suck so it’s over for now” said another Collingwood/Melbourne Storm Dan.

”Booooring”

”Did you watch Origun? Now that is entertaining sports”

France and Denmark drew 0-0 to make Australia’s loss ultimately inconsequential as Les Bleus topped the group with seven points, ahead of Denmark (five), Peru (three) and the bottom-placed Socceroos on just one point – like their score in all of their matches this World Cup.