Man That Doesn't Care About Consequences Orders The Carbonara

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT

A man with zero awareness or care for consequences has gone ahead and ordered the carbonara at a mid tier Italian restaurant.

John Turney (31), a gentleman that is notorious for his lack of forward thinking, has ordered a meal that is going to make him incapacitated only a few minutes after he finishes his carb heavy bowl of pasta, cream, egg yolks and bacon.

Friends dining with John say they tried to warn him, reminding him of the last time he attempted a creamy pasta dish and spent the rest of the afternoon clutching his stomach like a wounded man. 

But John reportedly waved them off, insisting that he doesn't have anything to do for the rest of the night and that he deserved it.

Witnesses say John showed no hesitation while ordering, brushing past lighter alternatives like the grilled chicken salad or the marinara and going straight for the heaviest, most sleep-inducing item on the menu.

“He didn’t even blink,” said one mate, still visibly shaken. 

“He just said 'carbonara, thanks’ like a man who’s got nothing left to lose.”

Restaurant staff, who have apparently seen this scenario unfold countless times, quietly placed an extra stack of napkins on the table, knowing full well what was to come.

By the time the bowl arrived, John was already loosening his belt in preparation, telling the table he was ready for battle.

witnesses reported that within 12 minutes of finishing, John retreated to the nearest couch, groaning softly and questioning every life choice he’s ever made.