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Scrolling through the notes application on her phone, Ellen Haye, has this morning come across some completely incoherent notes from a deep and life changing conversation she kind of remembers having on the weekend.
It’s believed she can almost decipher the meaning behind some of the notations but, unfortunately for Ellen, the potentially life changing chat might be as lost as her wallet.
“I remember the conversation, like it happening. And me saying ‘wait, let me get my phone so I don’t forget this’”
“It was good thinking at the time, but I was really let down by my sloppy salad fingers who were transcribing for me”
The Advocate managed to obtain a number of Ellen’s notes and judging by the letter and case sequence, she was absolutely pie-eyed.
“LErn, LEARn google quick QX” reads one of the notes.
“XQU Critical” reads another.
Ellen says the XQU one is the most frustrating, “What is critical?! Why didn’t I write out the whole word?”
“Fuck.”
With no obvious pattern or train of thought, we have sent Ellen’s notes on to our resident cryptographer to see if she can decipher anything from the night.
We’ve told Ellen we’d be in contact should anything come of it.
More to come.