Local Bloke Realises He Must Be Getting Old After Favourite Musician Gets Booked At The RSL

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact

A Betoota Ponds bloke has had a rather cruel taste of mortality this week, having experienced the excitement and crippling disappointment of finding out that your favourite band is coming to your town…but at the local RSL.

Steven Wright, 35, tells our reporter that he’d practically jumped out of his seat after learning that the punk band he loved as a teenager, ‘Dripping Pink’, would be coming to Betoota. But instead of rocking out at the stadium, they would instead be headlining at the Betoota Ponds RSL Club – a place known for $5 schooners, sticky carpets and a general feeling of melancholy.

Looking as though he was having some sort of crisis, Steven says he can’t believe a once popular band would be stooping so low. And more, that he already bought a ticket.

“Am I out of touch now?”, he queries earnestly, to which our reporter just shrugs, “I don’t get it, they were everywhere in the 2000s.

“I guess it’s not that cool to see 45 year old blokes with children singing about snorting blow and having group sex.”

“Oh god, it’s seated!”

More to come.