Local Bloke Buys Mildly Humorous But Actually Unusable Kris Kringle Gift

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact

A local man has once again demonstrated the true spirit of office gift giving by purchasing something that will get at most, get a couple of chuckles, but will ultimately end up at the back of someone’s cupboard.

Tom Willis, 32, is alleged to have wandered into a novelty store on his lunch break yesterday and emerged with a bottle of hot sauce labelled ‘Wet Fart’, which was a marginally better name than the ‘Anal Annihilator’ bottle he originally reached for.

The purchase was made for the office Kris Kringle or ‘White Elephant’ as it’s commonly known to be, where participants have the opportunity to steal presents.

Though it’s highly unlikely a sauce bottle that promises diarrhoea is going to be anyone’s pick.

But according to Tom, the sauce bottle will be a good ice breaker and a welcome change amongst what he’s sure will be a bunch of ‘boring gifts.’

“Nobody wants a yoga mat or a diary, this is a much better gift”, says Tom, confident it will be a hit next Friday, “I bet all the bloke’s will be fighting over it.”

Unbeknownst to Tom, the sauce bottle will get a small chuckle from the office pervert Terry, and groans of disapproval from the female office workers who weirdly aren't that keen on anyone obliterating the gender neutral toilets.

More to come.