Joyful Scenes As Young Bloke’s Pay Comes Through In The Midst Of A Financially Reckless Weeknight Piss Up

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

23-year-old Tommy Flint experienced a rare but pivotal canon event for Australian men overnight, after coming very close to wilfully doing his arse.

The grad-level finance worker doesn’t really have much walking around money, but he does have the same needs and impulses as most halfwit blokes in their early 20s.

With his mates all working in plush blue collar trades, or needlessly well-paid sales and property jobs, Tommy lives a life that could be described as very financially touch and go.

Which is why he found himself standing in a beer garden, late last night, doing the math in his head to figure out how many more schooners he could afford before he actually ran out of money.

Like, not one dollar to his name.

Tommy had flagged his monetary woes with his friends at the start of the night, before they launched into a no-reason midweek piss up.

They responded to this by saying they’d be happy to cover him. But nobody wants that. It was looking like Tommy was going to have to pull and Irish goodbye, despite the fact that this was very much where he wanted to be.

The beer was flowing and the clock was getting ever closer to midnight. But the time did not matter to the lads because they were talking absolute shit and they are still at an age where they can turn up to work tomorrow no matter how late they’ve been out.

In fact, the only person it mattered to was Tommy, who heading at light speed towards the immovable object that is an empty bank balance.

With rent sorted for the week, and dinner obviously not a consideration at all, Tommy only needed to hold on until the next morning when he gets paid again. But the problem was, his best mates and the pints of beer were in the pub, which is where he wanted to be, and he needs scrilla to take part.

However, it was while discreetly checking his bank balance on his phone for the possibility of an overdraft, that Tommy saw the hand of god at work.

His pay had come through a day early. He has a fortnight worth of cash in his bank account. And as anyone that age knows, you’re allowed to spend very frivolously – the moment it lands.

Put it down to the recent public holiday, or a glitch in the payroll software, or maybe this is when it always comes through, who gives a fuck. Tommy is on here.

“Who wants a drink!?” he roars.

The boys are now unsure whether a bet has come off, or if Tommy’s dipping into emergency funds, either way, they don’t give a fuck either. Pineapple vodkas for everyone.