Ibis Birds To Be Renamed Bin-Chickens

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

The street bird known as the Ibis will now be referred to as a ‘bin-chicken’ following direct action from the Minister for Agriculture.

This follows a series of complaints from official Zoologists, who feel the word Ibis should not apply to the Australianised species.

“Ibis is an African word to describe a majestic and elegant wading bird. In Australia, it is the opposite. the Australian ibis is fucking disgusting” says Barnaby Joyce

“If we had other land animals like cats or dogs snooping around the bins in our cities parks like these birds we’d have them swiftly put to sleep in a makeshift CBD kennel”

“Why should this hideous bird get off?”

The Coalition believes that to ease the cities chardonnay socialists into the idea of a mass execution of ibis birds would be a lot easier if we stigmatise them first”

“The last thing we want to do is what Baird did with the greyhound racing”

“Once this bird is known as a bin-chicken, it will be much easier to begin a cull”