"I Am So Back" Whispers Troy Buswell As Liberals Dump Gender Quotas And Net Zero

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Disgraced former WA Treasurer Troy Buswell has intimated this week that the "Liberals are back" after the party voted to get rid of gender quotas and a firm commitment to net zero emissions by 2050.

In his living room, somewhere south of Perth, the 59-year-old watched on as Opposition leader Sussan Ley made the announcement on Sky News. Though he has been convicted of egregious crimes and his controversy section on Wikipedia is Tolkien-esque, these recent developments from the Liberal partyroom indicate that stalwarts of yesteryear like Troy have been given the green light to return to the fold.

He stares at the glowing TV and laughes.

"Yeah, I think I could bump Michaelia (Cash) off the top of the senate ballot," Troy said.

"Maybe I should organise a game of golf with Hastie? Surely, he'd pick the phone up now. I mean, Barnaby Joyce is just a diet Troy Buswell, really."

Of his controversies, Buswell's most infamous is an alleged incident, that he later admitted to, where he sniffed the chair that a female staffer was sitting on shortly before. He then feigned a Flehmen response to it, curling his lips and writhing in mock pleasure.

"With these recent developments, that becomes funny again. A harmless prank. Something that, you know, the woke left would not understand the context of," Troy mulled over in his mind.

"I am so back. The Bus is leaving the station in 2028."

More to come.