Hyrox Competitor Actually The Furthest Thing From A Hybrid Rockstar On Planet Earth

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

Another one of life's great contradictions has been revealed this week, courtesy of a Betoota Heights man's conversation with an old mate.

Catching up with a mate from school as part of a wider friendship group session, Jack Wilson (29) was confronted by the oxymoron that is Hyrox.

Abbreviated from Hybrid Rockstar, the new style of athletic performance has gained huge popularity around the globe for its new spin on endurance events.

With competitors running for a k and then doing some shit like a 1000 burpees or whatever in 7 or 8 different sets, the new sport is experiencing a CrossFit like explosion.

However, while a healthy past time for those wanting to push themselves to the limit the name Hybrid Rockstar has since raised eyebrows.

"Mate, he was telling me all about it," explained Jack.

"And he was telling me about his diet."

"He's the furthest fucking thing from a rockstar I've ever seen in my life."

"Like we all know how rockstars live right? Whether it's your definition of living life to the fullest or not, they certainly go hard."

"And they were going hard before these city guys with demons decided they need to self flagellate themselves endlessly for whatever reason," said the man with a rapidly growing paunch.

"So I just don't think the new fitness craze can be using the phrase Rockstar."

"It's cultural appropriation."

When asked about the allegations Jack's mate laughed.

"Fuck, you try try running for a k and then doing wall balls!"

"That's pretty badass (sic) if you ask me."

No more to come.