Battle lines are being drawn at beaches across the nation this morning, as young families scramble to soak up another day in paradise.

With the final days of the school holidays fading, it’s believed hordes of parents in every state have filled the boot of their SUVs with beach accessories and camping structures and raced down to the nearest body of water to set up territory for the day.

For Betoota Grove family, the Watson-Whites, it’s believed today’s gorgeous weather has inspired them to go all out on their extensive beach setup as they enjoy the last day of holidays on a patch of sand in Noosa.

After poorly parking their LandCruiser Sahara over a few lines in the carpark, local Dad Jason reportedly took charge of filling the family beach trolley with a volleyball net, camp chairs and a wedding sized marquee, so large it should probably require a council permit to erect.

Then having found some space on the beach, the Watson-White family’s perfect day in the sun quickly came under threat, after coming across a white suburban family’s greatest nightmare, a group of Brazilian backpackers on the beach.

Upon hearing the unfamiliar sounds of Puerto Rican rapper Bad Bunny blast across the sand, the Watson-Whites allegedly decided to make a collective effort to protect the tranquillity of their day on public land.

Whilst attempting to hammer their 10m x 5m tent into the beach, Jason couldn’t restrain himself from piping up and offering his thoughts to the group of South Americans.

“Oi, turn that music down!” Jason squealed, looking over at the backpackers, quietly jealous they would probably have a better day than him. 

“Yeah the beach is for everyone!” screamed mother of the clan Sandra, “You guys don’t own the place!”

Unafraid of the threats of a pudgy suburban Dad who definitely doesn’t know jiu jitsu, it’s alleged one cheeky Brazilian backpacker returned serve with a fierce retort.

“Haha hey Aussie mate, go fuck yourself!” laughed Gabriel Pereira, “We’re gonna be here all day just like you!”


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