Dead-Eyed Coworker Says ‘Long Weekends Are Never Long Enough’ Over A Nescafé Gold

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Wanda Greenwich ripped the head off her second Nescafé Gold satchel and cast its body beside the sink along the other ones.

Monday is the cruellest day for the junior portfolio manager and the remnants of a wild weekend are still coursing through her body.

Speaking to colleagues in the third-floor kitchenette of the Bell Potter building in the Old City District, the 29-year-old said that long weekends are never long enough.

“I don’t feel recharged at all,” she said to Peta Simpson, also a junior portfolio manager.

“Don’t know why, I didn’t do anything on Saturday or Sunday. But the Queen’s big day was rather large.”

“This is my fourth coffee this morning and I still feel rooted, I’ve only got an elevated heartbeat and a heightened sense of baseless anxiety. How was your weekend?”

Peta nodded in agreement.

She also said that long weekends are never long enough and that no matter how much you try and rest, you still inevitably feel the same every Monday morning.

“Yeah, totally,” said Peta.

“All I did was basically nothing and I still feel tired. It’s the heat, I reckon. It’s the wet blub that’ll get you, I tell you what.”

And with that, they took two sips out of their bitter long instant black coffees and poured the rest down the sink.

More to come.