Recent Divorcee Set To Clean Up After Breaking Out This Old Favourite From 2009

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Break out the skinny jeans and Empire Of The Sun remixes, because one of Betoota’s most eligible young bucks is about to bomb dive back into the local dating pool.

Brett Grogson is back on the market as a 40-something.

And by 40-something, he means 49.

And by back on the market, he means very recently divorced after 15 years of marriage.

But Bretto says ‘it’s been coming for a while’.

This is why he feels more than okay with the prospect of hitting the town and trying to pick up birds as soon as he can.

Joined by his only other divorcee mate, who has not proven very succesful with the ladies since his own separation a year ago, and a random 25-year-old bloke from work – Bretto is back.

It’s time to test the waters.

While the nightlife scenery has changed drastically since he last hit the tiles, Bretto firmly believes his mildly succesful mid-twenties game will translate well into the new landscape.

The music is different, sure.

The women who take interest in him are a little bit older, obviously.

The wing-men are certainly not as reliable, and for some reason, they are now even drunker than they were in the 2000s.

But one thing never changes. The scent.

While getting ready in his serviced apartment earlier tonight, Bretto made sure to spray his neck six times with most reliable cologne that ever existed. He also sprayed both wrists. And his crotch.

‘Paco Rabanne 1 Million’ is described as a supremely facetted and harmonious fragrance with a high impact signature. It’s also flamboyant and audacious. All of these characteristics appeal to the fairer sex. Regardless of what age, or era.

And Bretto is drenched in the shit.

He’s also got a bit more walking around money nowadays, so it’s nothing for him to ‘shout’ a round of jager-bombs for the group at the table next to him.

“Haha. Enjoy your night girls” he says, with a wink.

The table of women, who didn’t really ask for a tray of dark spirits mixed with energy drinks, awkwardly thank him.

He forces his entourage to join him in mysteriously leaving the venue straight after.

The fellas ask him why he doesn’t stick around to introduce himself.

Bretto chuckles. Don’t worry. They’ll remember him.

It’s hard to forget that kind of audacious flamboyance.