37-Year-Old Still Pulls A Muscle Despite Doing 4 Legs Swings Before Launching Into 5km Run

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Local Betoota Heights man, Deano (37), says he’s at that age where he can’t really do much exercise without feeling immediate repercussions.

This comes as Deano decided to go for his first five kilometre run in six years. As a man who spends 50 hours a week behind a desk, and hasn’t played sport since a brief run of indoor soccer in 2016, this was something that was going to require a fair bit of preparation.

Namely, new running shoes. And a bright-coloured activewear shirt.

With two leg swings per limb, and a couple cross arm stretches, the big fella was ready to let rip on a 30 degree day.

It was at the 3500 metre mark of this explosive bout of extremely over-the-top cardio that Deano noticed a burning pain emerging in the side of his thigh.

Of course, he thought to himself. No matter how good his intentions were – or how committed he is to getting fit, he’s just getting a bit too long in the tooth for this kind of stuff.

“Yeah I’m not as durable as I used to be” said Deano.

“Once upon a time I used to be able to punch out a run like this easily after footy training. But look at me now”

As Deano limps home, with a healthy dose of self-pity, he’s come to terms with the fact that running five kilometres isn’t really appropriate for men in their late 30s.

“I mean, when you’ve got all the right gear, and you still hurt yourself even after a warm up, it’s nature’s way of telling you to stick to the treadmill”

“Or maybe that ab machine with the electric currents. Way lower impact”