Girlfriend That Hates Camping Actually Doesn’t Mind It After Four Fireside Tumblers Of Savy B

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

In breaking news, getting off your phone and drinking heaps next to a roaring fire is pretty awesome, it can be confirmed.

This story comes as Betoota Paralegal Alice Dammé enjoys her first ever time drinking heaps of cheap boxed wine and eating her weight in half-melted Easter choccies, as the Milky Way sparkles above.

As a well-to-do type who grew up in the affluent cul-de-sacs of Betoota Grove, Alice spent most of her family holidays either skiing overseas, or visiting her family's beach house down in Portsea.

Robbed of the chance to ever experience a filthy, dirty, fun weekend boating and waterskiing at a waterside caravan park, it’s believed this Easter Alice has joined her new boyfriend Blake and gone for a three night trip to Lake Webcke, about five four north of Betoota.

New to the whole camping thing, Alice spent the first few hours at Lake Webcke caravan park huffing, as she struggled to get into the rhythm of needing to trek 300m to a concrete toilet block every time she needed to empty her tiny bladder.

Coupled with the early onslaught of mozzie bites, Alice was quick to confirm in her own mind that camping simply wasn't for her.

But after tucking into the most luxurious dinner featuring two kinds of BBQ’d sausages and a chinese noodle cabbage salad fresh from a bag, Alice has finally found her calling as she sips on big cups of wine by the fire.

“Camping’s great!” she laughed, as she swilled her fourth Yeti tumbler of wine, that had been generously poured by her boyfriend’s Aunty Kaylene.

“We ssshould do this often, more… more often!” she slurred, as she flopped her hand on her boyfriend’s lap.

“What’s on tomorrow? Waterskiing? Whatever, I’ll give it a go, which way is the bathroom again?”

More to come.