Gen-Z Girlie Not Using Digicam Properly Until She Uploads 500 Photos To Facebook After A Night Out

SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT

A woman in Betoota’s French Quarter is currently taking a moment for some well-earned R&R after her friends subjected her to 6 hours of unpaid labour last night. 

About 3 weeks ago, Lily Tompkins (22) purchased a Nikon Coolpix from the Lifeline on High Street. 

In that time, she’s seen her friendships turn from organic to highly transactional. 

“I’m the only one in the group with one, so it’s basically like feeding time at the zoo everytime I whip it out,” she said. 

“I’ve got the girls texting me before we meet up telling me to make sure I bring it.”

“Then if I want a sleep-in the next day, I wake up to thirteen missed calls and almost a hundred texts. I’m on the verge of being exiled by the group, labelled a ‘gatekeeper’ and whatnot. 

However, millennials of Betoota, who this digicam resurgence is largely lost on, say these ‘gatekeeping’ accusations would have no leg to stand on if the Gen Zs would just practice the dark art of digital photography correctly. 

The Advocate caught up with local millennial and veteran digi-cam operator, Millie Smythe (35) to hear more.

“Ok, let me just start by saying I thought film cameras were still the moment, but whatever,” she said.

“But these girls have got it all wrong.”

“In fact, you don’t wait around for the photos the next morning. No, you sit there in a state of perpetual anxiety until you get a notification that your mates added 500 new photos to their timeline and you’re tagged.”

“You think fuck fuck fuck, I knew it, I knew she got some bad shots of me. But you sift through. And it’s so much worse than you thought.”

“But because it’s 2008, you just leave it. Removing yourself from the photo is not even an option. And you don’t think about it again until your coworker friend requests you on facebook in 2026 and sees an image of you doing a goonspin with a full on scene haircut and stretchers.”

“Yeah. Bad.”

“I just can’t fathom that these girls actually want to use a shitty camera where the flash makes you look like you live in a cave and haven’t seen sunlight for maybe 20 odd years.”

“But I guess that’s just the new thing. God I’m getting old.”

More to come.