Dad Breaks World Record for Most Consecutive Listens of Bruce Springsteen’s ‘Secret Garden’ After Getting Noise-Cancelling Headphones for Christmas

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A local father has reportedly broken a world record for most consecutive listens of Bruce Springsteen’s Secret Garden after receiving a pair of noise-cancelling headphones for Christmas.

David Clarke, 54, was gifted the high-end Bose headphones by his children in what they assumed was a thoughtful gesture. Instead, they have unknowingly facilitated his complete emotional withdrawal from the family unit.

“I put them on Christmas morning and, mate, it was like stepping into another dimension,” Clarke told The Advocate.

“No more yelling, no more ‘Dad, can I have $50?’ Just me and The Boss.”

Sources inside the Clarke household report that since unwrapping the headphones, he has been “completely unreachable,” spending entire afternoons sitting in the garage or slowly walking laps of the backyard, absorbing the soft synths and gentle snare brushings of Secret Garden on repeat.

Experts estimate Clarke has racked up nearly 1600 consecutive plays of the 1995 hit, with occasional detours into other Springsteen classics like Atlantic City, Philadelphia, and I’m On Fire. Each accompanied by a slow nod and deep sigh.

His wife, Sharon, says she only realised the extent of his disappearance when he failed to react to a neighbour reversing into his ute.

“He didn’t even flinch,” she said.

“I waved my arms in front of his face, and he just whispered, ‘She’ll let you in her house… if you come knockin’ late at night…'”

At press time, Clarke was last seen at the Bunnings nursery section, wearing the headphones and gazing solemnly at a lone lemon tree.

More to come.