Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney Pops Into Goulburn To Visit His Long Lost Cousin Todd

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The Canadian Prime Minister has quickly darted away from Canberra for some personal matters this morning, before boarding his flight back to Ottawa after a succesful diplomatic visit to Australia's Parliament House.

Mark Carney even told his security detail to take a break and get a feed at Kingsley's Chicken, as he endeavoured to blend into Australian society like a run-of-the-mill Canberra public servant.

After hailing a Capital Cab taxi, Carney asked the driver to take him one hour up the Hume highway, to the Southern Tablelands agriculture and correctional services hub known as Goulburn.

Canada and Australia should work towards negotiating trade and military pacts as “strategic cousins” - rather than competitors - was the key take away from Mark Carney's major address at in Canberra yesterday.

The Canadian PM called for enhanced cooperation on critical minerals, defence and trade, and announced Australia would join the G7 critical minerals alliance - while also declaring that his had visited Australian reaffirm the alliance between Ottawa and Canberra, amid the “global architecture now breaking down from consecutive crises”.

With his diplomatic duties wrapped up, Carney spent the evening in Canberra drinking pints of Capital XPAs and watching the Eels get obliterated by the Melbourne Storm at King O'Malley's in the CBD.

It was while watching this exciting opening round of Australian rugby league on the pub TV screen that Carney got to thinking it'd be a shame to leave Australia without reaching out to his long lost relatives up the round.

This morning, he made the call to visit Goulburn and see if he could get a line of his long-lost cousin, former NRL maverick Todd Carney.

"After seeing all of those players tattoos and unconventional haircuts, I thought I may as well see If Toddy was around" said the Canadian PM, who is a 2nd-cousin once removed with former footy star.

Todd Carney is renowed as the original Millennial bad boy of rugby league, known for his electric talent as a five-eighth and playmaker that saw him win an NRL Premiership in 2010 as well as the 2010 Dally M Medal.

He was also known for his wild and weird off-field antics, most of which was broadcast online in the early days of social media.

However, upon making his way to the main street of Goulburn today, Mark Carney was met was some disappointing news.

"Apparently my cousin's banned from this town" said the Canadian PM.

"I've never heard of that happening before. The locals tells me he 'had a skinful and was running on top of cars and the judge told him gorn fuck off - whatever that means"

"Guess I've gotta find a reason to make a diplomatic visit to Jakarta or the Gold Coast. I've been told I'll have better luck in Byron Bay or Bali"