Buzz Rothfield Forced To Get A Job In The Mines After Lack Of 2019 NRL Mad Monday Scandals

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

NRL ambulance-chaser Buzz Rothfield has today boarded his first flight to Moranbah, after having to up-skill for a FIFO job in the resources sector.

This mature-age career change comes after a squeaky clean end of season for the NRL, with zero Mad Monday scandals.

This means that reporters like Rothfield have had nothing to write about other than the solid on-field performances during the NRL finals. Which as we know, isn’t the NewsLimited or Channel 9 way.

Alarm bells began ringing for the NRL media after the final eight was announced a month ago, with not one club booking an inner-city venue and drinking until they lose all control of their faculties.

“Not even the Bulldogs” scowls fellow NRL reporter, and soon-to-be NBN contractor Danny Weidler.

“It’s not good for business. Honestly, we were expecting much more after such a schizophrenic off-season”

However, things are grim right across the board for the NRL’s off-field analysts, reporters, and beacons of moral absolutism.

From Wiloughby to Surry Hills to Mount Coot-Tha, lay-offs and voluntary redundancies are filling email inboxes – after failing to capture any long-range photographs of drunk blokes with tattoos getting their dicks out in a private venue while singing along to Neil Diamond.

Sitting in the REX airport lounge in Kingsford-Smith this afternoon, before flying out to the Bowen Basin where he will begin a new career digging coal, Rothfield says the lifeblood of rugby league journalism has always been the end-of-season benders that newspapers actively seek photos of – before high-horsing the players for acting like rugby league players

“They didn’t give us anything” said Rothfield.

“Luckily I was able to find work in the mines, because the Mad Monday Boom is over!”

“If these blokes are behaving off the field, I literally have nothing to write about”