Well-Raised Local Woman Feels Stab Of Guilt For Not Saying Please To Voice-Activated Assistant

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT

A local woman has today grappled with an irrational sense of guilt, when they dared to ask a voice assistant to turn the volume up without so much as a please or thank you.

It’s alleged Kirstie Beckett was sitting in her lounge room when the incident occurred, listening to a 70s mix while she typed away on her computer.

As Spotify delivered hit after hit, creating a radio based on a single song request, Kirstie found herself humming along to the likes of Cat Stevens, The Eagles and Fleetwood Mac as she tried, and failed to do work.

Pondering a life in the woods as she listened to the crooning sounds of Rhiannon blaring from the boom, Kirstie paused mid-work to request her smart device to turn it up 20%, because there was no way she could listen to a banger like that on low.

But in her eagerness to hear Stevie Nicks more clearly, Kirstie had barked an order instead of asking nicely, sending her into a spiral of guilt.

Though she shouldn’t have felt bad considering she was speaking to a machine, Kirstie immediately felt uncomfortable and apologised to the device, hoping she wasn’t on the hit list should machines decide to take over the world.

More to come.