Canberra Raiders Discreetly Dump 5000 Megalitres Of Lime-Flavoured Milk In Lake Burley Griffin

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

The nation’s capital is today struggling through a rough Monday.

The glum mood settling in over Canberra comes after one of the most melancholic Sundays in recent memories.

The cause of the bad vibes is the loss to the Cronulla Sharks in the NRL on Saturday, ensuring the Minor Premiers were historically bounced in straight sets.

The dismantling of the boys from the Bush Capital by the Sharks followed one of the toughest losses to swallow for Raiders fans.

Up 16 with fuck all time left on the clock the previous week against the Broncos, the Faiders had 3 match winning plays controversially chalked off in what can aptly be described as a serious rollercoaster.

So, 7 days after getting ready to host a prelim, the poor old Raiders are off to Bali.

And down the drain with the premiership hopes goes 5,000 megalitres of Lime Green Milk that had been produced to celebrate the Raiders premiership.

“Yeah, unfortunately we hit the order button after 60 minutes of the game against the Broncos,” sighed Raymond David, the media spokesperson for the club.

“And then forgot about it.”

“So we’ve had to dump it in LBG.”

“Obviously we told everyone involved in the club to come and collect as much milk as they wanted before we dumped it, but there’s only so much you can consume before it turns into one of Ricky’s press conferences.”

The discreet dumping has apparently angered environmental groups in the ACT, with concerns that it might cause the lake to go missing at the end of the season…

“It’s disgraceful, sure it might look good for a while, but it will turn and it will upset fans of the great body of water,” said one local environmental defender.

“Really disappointing behaviour after a huge year.”