Brainless Local Man With Tiny Cock Saddles Up For Another Drive Around Town In His Audi Q7

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A local man with nothing in his head except for white dogshit and  pigeons flying into windows has taken his Audi Q7 for a spin around town this morning.

As he cut off people and tried to reverse park repeatedly in a spot too  small for his stupid fucking car, he looked at himself in the rear  vision mirror and knew deep down that he’s trade everything he had for a  normal sized cock.

The Betoota Grove man spoke briefly to The Advocate this morning but our  reporter didn’t really listen to what he was saying and forgot to  record the conversation.

He told us about his business, which was in textiles or clothes or something that definitely wasn’t money laundering. But as he walked through the Cornwallace Arcade in the Old City District, it seemed slightly uneasy.

For nearly an hour, he talked and talked and talked but didn’t say anything worthy of reporting.