Boyfriend Spends Entire Screening Of Wuthering Heights Fantasising About Lifting Elordi In A Line Out

KEITH T. DENNET | New South | CONTACT

It’s a big week for blockbuster films in Betoota, as thousands of local women flock to watch the most talked about film in town.

With Emerald Fennell’s incredibly loose adaptation of ‘Wuthering Heights' hitting cinemas, it’s understood all session times at both the North Betoota Hoyts, and the Golden Curtain Cinema in the French Quarter, are fully sold out.

Yet amongst the flood of females attending to indulge in two hours of Jacob Oh-My-Lordy’s perfectly sculpted cheek bones, one boyfriend has told The Advocate, he’s been having some fantasies of his own.

Speaking to 32-year-old Dean Gregan, after being dragged to tonight’s showing of Wuthering Heights, the local front-rower has found himself dreaming about an alternative universe, where he and Jacob are scrum buddies.

“I know he’s gone with the acting career, but it would’ve been great to see him in the green and gold” said Dean, who just walked out of Cinema 3 at the Betoota Westfield Hoyts.

“Tall glass of water like him, with that reach and nimble hips, he could’ve been the second coming of John Eales.”

Dean has privately told The Advocate that he believes he and Jacob could’ve made a real go of it, had they both not been plagued by injuries and Hollywood careers, there's a world where both of them played for the Queensland Reds.

“I’m not saying we were both destined for contracts, but with my lifting skills and Jacob’s muscular hands"

"I think we would've been a formidable duo. A real Giffin and Eales on the tryline with minutes to go type operation"

“But I spose when you've gotta choose between World Cup Wallabies glory or travelling the globe on a press tour with Margot Robbie…”