Boomer Torn Between Viciously Ridiculing Nephew Over Electric Vehicle, And Asking For A Quick Spin

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A local semi-retired plumber from our town's pebblecrete paradise of Betoota Heights, has spoken to The Advocate about an existential conundrum that confronted him this past weekend.

Enjoying the company of his extended family for his daughter's 21st on Saturday, Andrew Thomas found himself at 6's and 7's - pardon the reference.

The cause for consternation came in the form of his nephew's shiny new Tesla, parked up on his driveway.

Famous for circulating memes and videos insinuating men performing sex acts on each other is synonymous with electric vehicle ownership, Andrew reportedly felt his loins tingling after hearing other members of the family discuss the 'go' the Tesla has.

Already 5 vicious sledges down at his nephew George by 4pm on Saturday, Andrew said he felt the urge to take the Tesla for a quick whip growing on him.

"Yeah, like most blokes, once that seed get's planted I struggle to stop it from growing," laughed Andrew.

"But obviously I knew that if I asked for a little test drive, I somewhat forfeit my right to ask George if he keeps his dildos in the Tesla's frunk."

In the end, Andrew said the temptation to drive a new vehicle and see what the carry on was about was just too much.

"Look, no harm in just seeing how it handles and all that," said Andrew.

"That doesn't mean it's not a xxxxxxx xxxxxx xxxxxxxx car," he said.

"Go on, put that in your paper."