“Bloody Hell These Indian Farmers Love A Whinge, Don’t They?” Says Local Farmer

ERROL PARKER |Editor-at-large | Contact

A Betoota Downs grazier has had a bit of a chuckle to himself catching up with what’s been doing on in India recently, telling The Advocate that they must love having a bit of a whinge.

Timothy Dalright, of Dalright Dorpers, explained to our reporter this afternoon as they walked throughout the grass-lined sheds and silos of his four-thousand-acre property that he thinks his Indian counterparts are starting to take the piss a bit.

“Mate, you know what’s going on over there? So basically, these farmers used to sell all their produce through government markets where they were guaranteed a certain minimum price. Anyway, the government has been paying under that price, citing the pangolin’s wrath,”

“So these blokes blew up at the government and the government said, ‘Mate, why don’t you just cut me out and go straight to the private market, they’ll pay you more and blah blah blah,’ but then by doing that, they’re removing the minimum price guarantee so now they’re blowing up even more.”

When asked what he thought would happen in Australia if the government tried to pull that, Tim chuckled even harder.

“Mate, if we had to sell our produce through a government market, I reckon we’d be storming Parliament House like those bastards in America. We still have our guns so we’d put up a good fight against those rent-a-cops they have littered around that high palace of corruption and adultery,” he said.

“But I take your point. Yeah mate, it’d be bad but fuck we wouldn’t be carrying on like that. Going down to the city and blocking roads and stuff. Maybe in the 80s but not now.”

More to come.