Baba Says Djoko Will Cure Cancer After He’s Done Winning This Tennis

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A French Quarter area grandmother has made the bold claim that tennis player Novak Djokovic will vanquish the Spanish Dancer after he’s done crushing his opponents in the Australian Open.

Ljerka Kovačić , of Rue Des Parc De L’Héroïne, explained very thoroughly to our reporter this morning in the shared laundry of an apartment block that she has a high opinion of Novak and that he is a superstar.

“He will cure cancer when he is finished winning,” Mrs Kovačić said.

“And then he will go back and win more tennis to become the greatest ever. Did you know that in Switzerland, there is German provinces and French ones. All of the trouble comes from the French ones, which Roger Federer is from,”

“In Spain, all they do is eat, sleep and yell at each other. No, you see Novak is a hard worker, he is Serbian. He will be the best.”

Our reporter nodded and continued feeding silver coins into the washing machine.

“When you are finished with that, I have some food for you. Hurry up with the coins, my child.”

Despite telling Mrs Kovačić that our reporter had enough food, the Serbian-born matriarch of our apartment complex insisted on giving our reporter a plastic bag with three skinless barbecue chickens inside it.

“Thank you, Mrs Kovačić,” said our reporter.

“This is a lot of food.”

More to come.