Boomers With 5 Properties And $4.9M In Super Reduced To Gruel And Stale Bread In Jim's Communist Dystopia
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After a lifetime of selflessly serving the state that gave them nothing by incredible employment, free
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Loving Husband Forced To Talk Shit About Wife During Game Of Golf
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A round of golf with the gents turned into a sordid affair for Bill Hurst (66)
Liberal Donor Wondering If Its Been Long Enough To Hit Up Dutton To Sort A Visa For An Au Pair
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Waiting patiently for a few months now, a prominent local businessman has confirmed today that he
Beachgoer Completes Ultimate Act Of Friendship And Rubs Sunscreen Into Mates Back
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Zach Brown has been praised for his efforts today. The 28-year-old plumber from Betoota Heights pushed
Government Rolls Out Emergency Aid Package For Instagram Influencers Following Too Much Rain
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In a big move this morning, the Prime Minister has announced a 102 million dollar package
Local Mum 19 Days Into Ocsober Still Feeling Like She Is Running The Gauntlet At Breath Test
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local mother irrationally went through a raft of scenarios in her head moments ago. The
Man Not Willing To Engage In Fistfight With Complete Stranger In Public Labeled A Dropnuts
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local man is facing stinging criticism today after his attempts at trying to resolve conflict
“Curls Get The Girls” Confirms Possible Serial Killer
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A long and wildly held theory has been confirmed today. The theory, that curly hair is
Rising Tennis Star’s Dad Praised For Going Full Season Without Following An Umpire To His Car
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In a feel-good story coming out of Betoota’s Flightpath District today, a local tennis dad
Anti-Abortion Protestors Surprisingly Not Too Interested In Saving Dying Kids On Nauru
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Queensland’s Pro-Lifers are still seething after the state passed legislation yesterday legalising abortion. The self-appointed
Nation’s Half-Pissed Stockbrokers Distraught To Learn New $50 Notes Aren’t ATM Friendly
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Stockbrokers around the country are sprouting the timeless phrase; ‘If it ain’t broke, don’t
Nauru Detainees Traumatic Childhood Behind Bars To Be Blamed On ‘Administrative Error’
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Thanks to an explosive leak from inside the Coalition Party Room, the government’s updated plan
‘Locals Only’ Tag At Metropolitan Beach Makes It Clear Only A Few Million People Can Surf Here
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Just in case there ever was any doubt, a poorly graffed tag on the foreshore of