Word Of The Week: Apricity (The Beautiful Warmth Of The Winter Sun)
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT With Naplan scores dropping and literacy seemingly slipping away in an age of autocorrect, The Betoota
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“I Don’t Really Burn,” Says Local Moron About To Be Burnt
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite claims that his ‘olive skin’ tans and doesn’t burn, a local moron
RSPCA Confirms That Even Outside Dogs Are Allowed Inside During Thunderstorms
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The RSPCA has reminded pet owners around the country today that strict rules on dogs staying
Man Realises He’s Old After Gasps Replace Laughter Following Recent Fall
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A few short years ago, Marty Dollarhyde was playing Golden Oldies league with his
Girl Celebrates Little Brother’s 21st With Photo That Clearly Shows Who Got The Genes
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local girl, Kat Donald (27) has today posted a lovely Facebook tribute to her little brother
Circumcised Mate Presents Unfounded Theory That Opposite Sex Prefers It
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A man who’s parents decided to hack off the top of his penis for no
Hugger Beats Handshaker To Greeting
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In what was a dramatic race, it has since been confirmed the hugger beat the handshaker
Trendy Inner-City Burger Joint Fined For Not Playing Enough Wu-Tang Clan
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A trendy inner-city burger bar is under fire for reportedly playing the same Wu-Tang
Fully Grown Adults Clap At Something They Just Saw On Television
An entire room full of fully grown adults have been spotted yelling and clapping at a television in the Lord
Local Boomers Not Thrilled With The Fact Their Daughter Met Her Fiancé On Bumble
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Speaking candidly to The Advocate once he’d left his comfy Betoota Heights Queenslander,
Local Weirdo Selects Cheque As Preferred Payment Option
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT What the fuck? A South Betoota woman has just chosen to make a purchase with a
Long-Term Boyfriend Gives Up And Just Opts For Novelty Anniversary Gift
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local boyfriend has today saved himself the time, money, and stress that comes with a
Supermarket Treats Essential Workers To 2 Drink Voucher Chrissy Party At Shit Local Irish Pub
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local store for a giant Supermarket chain has been commended for lavishing it’s overworked