After Only 6 Months Under Socialist Rule, New Yorkers Say This Is The Best Year Of Their Lives
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For the first time since 1973, the New York Knickerbockers are NBA champions -after a 94-
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Local Piece Of Shit Can’t Handle Bec At Her Worst But Thinks He Deserves Her At Her Best
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In Central Betoota, reports are coming forward that local girl Rebecca (Bec) Lees is dating a
Tony Jones Accidentally Refers To Magda As ‘Comrade’ In Slip Of Tongue During Q&A
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Actress and same-sex marriage advocate Magda Szubanski has come out today to clear her name
Local Man Hits Happiest Low Point As Kebab Shop Guy Asks If He’s Having ‘The Usual’
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT After a long day at work, featuring an early start, late finish and a passive-aggressive
Police Called After Dad Serves Up Leftover Apricot Chicken For Dinner
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Two police squad teams answered an urgent call from a South Betoota home at 7:14
Thai Restaurant Matriarch Doesn’t Give A Fuck About Where You’d Like To Sit
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An efficient and assertive floor manager at a prominent Thai restaurant has made it clear that
Peking Duk Reveal Plans For 2018: Buying The Raiders And Appointing Ken Nagas As Coach
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following a warm reception to the release of their new single ‘Let You Down’ featuring Swedish
Brisbane Says It’d Prefer A Real Youth Crime Problem Over These Lame Fucks On Scooters
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The people of Brisbane are cringeing today at the fact that the closest thing to street-
NBN Mail Out Urine Sample Jars As They Begin To Literally Take The Piss
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Contractors responsible for the National Broadband Network have today begun mailing out urine sample jars to
Man Starts Caring About Astronomical Sexual Assault Rate Once It Involves Immigrants
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In the wake of the viral #metoo hashtag, out of touch men worldwide have gained some
Nan Shocks Nation With Coherent Answer On Family Feud
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT After an abysmal third round that saw the Wright family strike three incorrect answers in a
Financial Sector Confirm “Staff Bonding” Code For “The Boss Will Be Doing Cocaine Too”
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Feeling extremely delicate, tender, frazzled and flat, young Sam Wilson is not in a good state
Club Promotor Just Wants To Thank Beautiful People For Being Part Of An Amazing Night
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT According to local club promotor Christian Van Der Veld (32), Betoota’s premiere nightlife destination ‘The