Most Racist Bloke In Town Always Seems To Have A Missus That Isn't The Same Race As Him
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT One of the loudest blokes at the South Betoota Plains Hotel has today been forced to
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Annastacia In Heaven After Winning Olympics And Closing Border On NSW Within 24 Hours
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WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The premier of Queensland has confirmed to The Advocate that days don’t get much better than yesterday.
Speaking from Tokyo after being ‘pressured’ to stay for the opening ceremony of the Olympics, Annastacia Palaszczuk explained that she can’t think of a better 24 hours than the one she’s just had.
“Slamming the border shut on NSW barely 12 hours after winning the bid to host the 2032 Olympics in Brisbane feels like a dream-like state,” laughed Anna today.
“Snagging the Olympics has pretty much got my premiership locked up until 2032, and rolling out the police officers from the Tweed out to the Mitchell Highway is just the cherry on top.”
Her comments come after Queensland announced yesterday that it would be shutting it’s border to NSW residents, unless you have exceptional circumstances or are an elite Rugby League player.
“Sorry border town residents, tourism operators, and split families it’s time to shut up shop again,” said the Premier, who many around the nation seemed shocked to learn doesn’t actually care about Sydney votes.
“Imagine if I went to Tokyo and the spicy cough got into Queensland.”
“Excatly.”
“So I leave you with that thought while I go and grab a Ramen and an Asahi and get ready for the Opening Ceremony tonight.”
More to come.