Unsure What To Spend His Money On, Talentless Single Man Buys A Cool Drone

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

After a profitable quarter, sales executive Louis Roberts (34) has found himself with six weeks accrued leave and substantial savings in his account.

Single, already owning his own flat and resigning himself to never being good at music or sport, Roberts’ took the plunge this week and purchased a drone.

“It’s mad fun, paid for itself already. All the guys at boot camp love it.”

While Robert’s circle of peers are happy he has found a quasi-legal hobby, it has not been without it’s share of rough patches.

“Yeah it was great at first.” says longtime friend Malcolm Colmes. “Except he’s never let me fly it and it’s all he fucking talks about now.”

Criticism has also come from Roberts’ family.

“He brought it to my daughters christening!” stated sister Mary Roberts. “It was an indoor event for crying out loud!”

When asked about this, Roberts didn’t seem to think it was as big a deal as his sister.

“She has her baby,” he laughs “And I have mine!”