4th Grade Squad Launch Into Gruelling Pre-Season With A Splash Of Beach Touch

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

The whistle of a Wahu footy has brought about many smiles this morning, as a local 4th grade rugby side launch into their pre-season.

With shoes and shirts off, up to nine members of the Betoota Muttaburrasaurus’s were spotted tossing the footy around on the shores of Lake Betoota, in what is believed to be the first official training of 2026.

“It’s great to see the boys back into it, although judging by some of the bulging bellies getting around, we might need a few more sand sessions before we start any ball work,” club captain-coach Phil Dudley told The Advocate.

“We’ve also lost a few aging bodies to ACL injuries these past few years, so we’re on the hunt for new blood to join the team. Here’s hoping the local abattoir has brought some extremely fit Fijians in for another 6 month contract.”

The return of footy is great news for local ruck n’ maul enthusiasts, and long-suffering girlfriends who’ve had to spend summer entertaining their boofhead boyfriends, many of whom have been starved of contact sports for the best part of five months.

And while greenskeepers down at Elton Flatley Oval begin work to install a set of uprights, the Mutts have got their own set of challenges, and that is getting enough players to have some firepower on the bench.

“Our biggest threat this year is those thin limbed lads down at the Betoota Kittens AFL club, after the Brisbane Lion’s win last year, AFL is gaining momentum in the Diamantina for the first time in 20 years.”

“The Kittens have picked up most of the Irish expats in town, promising them it’s kind of like gaelic football. So between them and all the teenagers in Betoota who’d rather scroll their phone than toss a footy, our biggest challenge this year is fielding the numbers.”

“But just you watch, a few more beach touch sessions and the boys will come out of the woodwork, they just need to thaw out a bit after silly season.”