Chris Hemsworth Found Unconscious In Brisbane Park After $4 Basics At The Vic

“They were off their lemon spreads,” said onlooker Dean Thiesfield.

Chris Hemsworth Found Unconscious In Brisbane Park After $4 Basics At The Vic

26 August, 2015 9:30

MERV HARRIS | Brisbane | CONTACT

The Betoota Advocate can exclusively report that Australian movie superstar and current Foxtel ad actor Chris Hemsworth was found unconscious this morning in the Botanic Gardens in Brisbane, surrounded by bits of a half-eaten kebab and his right arm covered in entry stamps.

Reports have emerged that Hemsworth and fellow Avengers actor Tom Hiddleston had taken advantage of The Victory Hotel (locally known as The Vic) and their $4 basics on Thursday nights, and had banged on a session as epic as the movies they star in.

The Advocate understands that Hemsworth and Hiddleston – who are in Brisbane filming the next instalment in the Thor franchise – were still in The Vic’s beer garden at approximately 2am this morning yelling at the live band to play Khe Sanh, and according to witnesses had covered their table with vodka sunrises.

“They were off their lemon spreads,” said onlooker Dean Thiesfield.

“They were putting them away fuckin’ quick, they must ‘av been bloody thirsty.”

Kristen Jones, a bartender at The Vic, said they almost ran out of vodka after being “pillaged by Hemsworth and that toffy English bloke.”

“They came in about 8 o’clock last night,” she said.

“They only got one each at first – they must have got a taste for it. By the time my shift ended they were buying trays at a time between the two of them and polishing them all off at a fucking rapid rate.”

“It’s one of the best displays we’ve seen at The Vic since about four kitchen fires ago,” said bar manager Nick Stein.

“Obviously being big Hollywood stars they get away with stuff that locals would be punted for, but it’s good for business – although I suspect Hiddleston might have spewed in the pokie room, we’re reviewing the CCTV footage at the moment.”

It’s understood that earlier in the night Hemsworth had won the mini jackpot on Where’s The Gold, and had reinvested the winnings on the fifth at Albion Park.

The Advocate was also inundated with reports at around 3.30am this morning that the pair were spotted dancing on top of a table at the ‘Dunder (Down Under Bar). One report included that they had ordered five ‘jam jars’ each, and had made light work of the potent jungle juice.
A representative for Marvel Studios, Madeline Boulton, declined to comment other than to say there were a couple of boys with ‘very sore heads’ on set today.

11 Responses to "Chris Hemsworth Found Unconscious In Brisbane Park After $4 Basics At The Vic"

  1. Joely Sullivan   August 26, 2016 at 12:19 pm

    Where is the RESPONSIBLE Service of Alcohol here?

    Reply
  2. peter   August 26, 2016 at 12:45 pm

    Unconscious or sleeping….? You don’t need to lie to get attention for your story

    Reply
  3. Drolgat   August 26, 2016 at 2:58 pm

    How pathetic. Any other patron would of been refused service and most likely asked to leave. In don’t care how famous you are. Rules are rules and they apply to every human being. Imagine if they got hit by a car. Your hotel would be held responsible even if it happens an hour after they leave. All because you kept serving them alcohol when they were clearly drunk. Police should investigate the professionalism of the hotel esp serving intoxicated people alcohol is a major crime that comes with major fines

    Reply
  4. rod_farva   August 26, 2016 at 4:27 pm

    where was the code green on them?

    Reply
  5. Steve   August 26, 2016 at 4:36 pm

    Believable or not. Sounds like a great night out.

    Reply
  6. Benji   August 26, 2016 at 6:14 pm

    My favorite part about this article is the comment section

    Reply
  7. Polly   August 26, 2016 at 9:51 pm

    What a load of shit, if they consumed that much grog no way would they still be alive. Good old responsible service of alcohol at its best and seriously how does a pub almost run out of vodka because of 2 drinkers.

    Reply
  8. Michele   August 26, 2016 at 11:48 pm

    LOL cute way of plugging Brissie businesses and the movie too. 🙂

    Reply
  9. drolgatfan   August 27, 2016 at 5:07 pm

    drolgat be trollin

    Reply
  10. Alex Rigg   September 5, 2016 at 10:38 am

    I once stuck a jam jar up my anus

    Reply

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