Once thought to be almost definitely extinct, the Anglo-French given name of Graham was resurrected in a Townsville hospital overnight.

The name – which is historically believed to be a combination of possibly meaning “gravel”, and ham, meaning “hamlet” – has not been registered a new name by Australian Births Deaths And Marriages since 1962.

The parents of the child, Grace and Grant, say that its a name they believe is making a comeback.

“Our neighbours just had a baby girl called Czar-Czar” says the father.

“What the hell is that! What ever happened to good, normal names like Graham and Bronwyn?”

However the midwife isn’t so sure about the likelihood of the child’s name coming roaring back into primary schools around the country.

“I couldn’t believe it. I’m standing there looking at this mother with her brand new baby boy… and she decides to call him Graham?” said Rhonda, a 52-year-old career womb raider.

“He’s like 10 minutes old. He doesn’t own a printing company”

The controversy surrounding the name being given to an infant comes from the fact that many people fear a name like Graham can’t be shortened to anything more youthful.

Local kindergarten teacher, Wendy Applewood, says Graham is going to have a tough time.

“He’s going to be called Graham for his entire life”

“You can’t call him anything but that. ‘Gray-ey’ doesn’t work. He’s got a 52-year-old man’s name from day one”



    • Or for that matter, ‘Grazza’, ‘Gazza’, or ‘Gray-gray’. Mrs Applewood is certainly old enough to know at least a few of these.

  1. My grandfather is name graham and my father is graham. My parents had 3 girls other wise one of us would have been graham if we were a boy. I like the name graham and half the names these days are not a proper name.

  2. I have been called Graham since I was a baby and have never had any problem with it. I have always thought it a good thing that it is hard to shorten. I really don’t understand the need to shorten other people’s name – why not call them by their given name as it is a sign of respect for them.

  3. Congratulations on the birth of your little boy! Graham is an awesome name! Its different without being weird or unheard of. It sounds similar to trendy names like Liam, Callum & Grayson, yet he will probably be the only Graham in his class. A great choice! Enjoy your little man!

  4. My name is Graham and I was born in 1979. I’m fine with it. I get the occasional “Grazza” and “Gray” and once “Gray-Bags” (I think care of ‘The Goodies’…).


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