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After dozens of people were gunned down across two mass shootings over the weekend, pressure is on Congress to address this bizarre 40-year-old trend of people walking into public places with military-grade weapons and shooting people until they themselves are either shot or sentenced to life in prison.

The nation’s favourite past time of being indiscriminately, or discriminately, killed in a hail of bullets, has been a great hurdle for American lawmaker over the years.

Many say that considering no new preventative laws were brought in after the Sandy Hook massacre, where twenty toddlers were murdered by a fucking virgin loser who was armed with his mother’s AR-15 that he stole from her cold dead hands after killing her himself – they don’t expect to see this problem ever going away.

However, Senate Judiciary Chair Lindsey Graham announced Monday he has reached a deal with Democratic Sen. Richard Blumenthal to jointly introduce legislation involving “stay-home laws that allow police, with the consent of a judge, to seize control of public space that looks appetising to a waste-of-oxygen who wants to kill heaps of people in the name of white supremacy.

Stay-home laws are already in place in 17 states and the District of Columbia. The bill would not expand them nationwide, but instead provide grant funding to states to close down shopping malls and public schools whenever they feel like.

Despite being less controversial than other policies pushed by pro-living, such as universal background checks and a ban on assault weapons, there are still doubts it will pass.

Many Republicans say the proposed ‘stay-home laws’ could infringe on their citizens constitutional rights to put innocent people at risk of the mental health issues of pale porn-addicted incels who got laughed at by Hispanic girls on the bus once.

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